#Accusations

It got ugly. She accused me of something that never entered my mind. I was taken aback as I just trying to explain the reasons and she did not want to hear. She was offended and then I made a mistake. I could have paused and asked God for some wisdom, but I didn't. I did the natural thing and counted on myself to come up with the right words. Wrong.

Looking back on the incident an hour or so later, I 'should' on myself. I began thinking of what I should have said. Then the thought came to me that this incident was so out of the ordinary, that it must have been inspired by my enemy and God had allowed it to help me see something important. That important thing was that my tendency to rely upon myself is strong. He was helping me see myself as He sees me and giving me something to work on, to change.

I don't know her motives, but I am to think good of her until her motives are revealed. As I prayed for myself, asking God to forgive me for leaving Him out of the equation, I prayed for her. There has been some changes in me over time, because I reached the place of confession much sooner than in the past. God is so interested in me being conformed to the image of Christ that He uses negative happenings to open my eyes. I had to thank Him for His loving kindness to me.

Jeremiah 17:9 and 10 tell us that "The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it? I, the Lord search the heart, I test the mind..." We cannot know all that hides within our hearts. God knows and sees the deceit. He loves us anyway, no matter, but being a good father, He must rear us and that includes opening our eyes to those faults. By His grace He gives us one more chance to grow up.

I expect there to be a test in this particular mode as I work on changing. Hope I pass.